This holiday season feels less worrisome with the pandemic hopefully becoming more manageable in our everyday life. However, there have been many unknown effects on our children’s mental health over the last couple of strange years.
“More than 25% of high school students reported worsening emotional and cognitive health and over 20% of parents with children ages 5-12 reported similar worsening conditions for their children.” (from The Pandemic’s Impact on Children’s Mental Health)
We can all feel it. So our children must be feeling it too. The world is different, parents have been worried, teachers are frustrated, and the kids notice! It’s no wonder that mental health issues have become more prominent in our discussions for adults as well as for children.
The phrase “mental health” certainly encompasses a lot of different things. But it doesn’t always mean a diagnosis of a problem. We all have brains and emotions and we should all be concerned about how we treat others. We often talk about our physical health (especially during the holidays), but shouldn’t we all be thinking about how “healthy” we are MENTALLY as well?
Nicholas J. Westers, Psy.D., ABPP, a Children’s Health clinical psychologist and Associate Professor at UT Southwestern, explains, “Good mental health is really about creating, encouraging and using everyday healthy habits – like sharing and acknowledging feelings, correcting unhealthy and unhelpful thinking, showing empathy and building resiliency.” (from 8 ways you can improve your child’s mental health)
Everyday mental health doesn’t have to be consulting with a professional (though this is never a bad idea for our complex human minds). Mental health can be (and probably should be) nurtured and cared for every single day. As parents, our job is to provide a healthy environment for our kids both physically… and mentally. The physical stuff… we get that: food, shelter, safety. The mental stuff… is a lot harder to see and define.
With the hustle and bustle of the holidays, it is easy to lose track of ourselves mentally, let alone keeping an eye on our little one’s mental health. Here are 5 SIMPLE ways you can nurture your kid’s mental health all throughout the year (but especially during the holidays):
1. Make Eye Contact – It’s easy to forget this when we get busy. While shopping, wrapping presents, talking about our days, simply making eye contact can go a long ways with making our children feel heard and a part of our world.
2. Connect – Whether it’s coloring (see below), walking outside, singing in the car, or sharing a holiday crossword, your undivided attention matters to kids. Even just 5 minutes of a shared connected activity opens the door to communication and is better than a distracted hour of errands or chores around the house.
“Safety and connection allow children to develop into self-confident individuals who trust their environment and have the self-regulation skills needed to succeed. These moments of “eye contact, touch, presence and playful situations” are the building blocks of true and everlasting bonds.” (from The Power of Connection with Children, Conscious Discipline Becky Bailey)
3. Hug – There are so many benefits to hugging. It doesn’t take much time or effort and it is something we sometimes forget to do when we get busy with the going and the doing of all the things during the holidays.
“Hugs might be a simple act of affection, but they carry the power to boost not only our mood, but our psychological wellbeing, too.” (from 7 powerful physical and mental health benefits of hugging)
4. Give Complements – By acknowledging their accomplishments this year, children will feel that they matter. Even in a hectic world of unknowns, their efforts are seen and recognized. Encourage how well they did on a recent test or reward their kind behavior towards siblings. Our life as parents is won in the little victories.
“Your attention helps build their self-confidence and self-esteem.” (from What Every Child Needs For Good Mental Health)
5. Help Others – There are many opportunities during the holidays to show kindness and help others. Whether it is telling the mailman thank you or helping grandma set the table for Christmas dinner, children can see that the world is better when we work together.
“Helping others and getting involved in reinforces being part of the community.” (from Supporting Children’s Mental Health: Tips for Parents and Educators)
Here’s an easy activity to share and connect with your kids… maybe even open the door to some fun conversations. Even if it’s for 5 minutes, I hope you find time this holiday to connect and nurture your own mental health as well as your child’s.
Tell us in the comments below your favorite holiday activities and how you feel connected with your kids. We’d love to hear from you!